Oh, the delights of a sassy little toddler. Adam’s current favorite words are “no” and “mine.” Most frequently used together. And usually in an attempt to stop Nick from grabbing at something that Adam claims to be his. Andy has tried to enlighten Adam by explaining that nothing is actually his. We own everything, and we are simply allowing him to use our things. Of course, this means nothing to Adam. He just knows that he liked Nick a whole lot more when he was less functional. And even now, Nick doesn’t really have any idea what he’s grabbing for. All he knows is that his arms are starting to go in the general direction he wants them to and that whatever he comes in contact with, he’s going to pinch as hard as he can and attempt to shove into his mouth. This could be a toy, a piece of clothing, my chin, my hair, my chin hair…anything. And let me tell you something, that kid can pinch. If you are fond of your beard or chest hair, I would suggest you avoid contact with my baby. He will mess you up.
Although Adam definitely has his challenging moments, for the most part, he’s just getting really funny. I think this is mostly because of how verbal he’s getting. I know I’m probably going to look back and laugh at myself for being excited about all the questions Adam is starting to ask, but right now, I love it. He’s super curious about everything. And the way that he asks questions is pretty entertaining. When we were on vacation, we hung out at a park with some friends, and they must’ve been doing some excavating around the park because there was a big pile of dirt along the sidewalk. Adam turned to Andy and asked, “what’s that, dada?” And it seemed so funny. Primarily because he had never asked something so formally before. He even included the name of the person he was asking. And also because the answer to his brilliant question was, “a big pile of dirt.” But Adam was delighted to hear this response. As if that was the exact, sophisticated answer he was anticipating.
As Andy and I try to answer all of these new questions Adam is coming up with, I feel like we try to explain the answer in a way that Adam can comprehend. Even explaining WHY the answer is what it is. Perhaps this is why Adam has recently felt the need to state obvious facts. The best example of this is, “mama is mama.” This echoes his previous obsession with “roll call,” naming everyone in the room, but now he’s now getting a little more existential. He will go around and say, “dada is dada,” “Adam is Adam,” “Lola is Lola,” etc. You can’t really argue, he’s right, but what does it mean?? Sometimes he will even say things that freak me out. The other day, we were in our house and he just said, “someone in there,” pointing into a room. And I was like, “I fucking hope not. I should call the police. Why would you say that? Nobody is in there!!!!!” I’m going to err on the side of him not really understanding the whole “truth” concept, as opposed to entertaining the thought that my son can see ghosts.
In addition to freaking me out, Adam has also gotten good at making me feel somewhat inadequate as a mother. That sounds pretty dramatic when I say it like that. It’s not like he’s being mean-spirited or anything, it’s mostly that he points out something that is fairly embarrassing…and a little incriminating… Ok, FINE, I will tell you what I’m talking about. As I’ve mentioned before, I hate going to the grocery store. It involves a lot of planning and steps and I don’t like putting on real pants, so I only go to the store when I have to. A couple weeks ago, I was actually feeling pretty good about my parenting competency. I even had milk available for Adam. However, when I put it in his cup to drink, he took a sip and said, “icky cup.” Now, this wasn’t terribly shocking. Sometimes if I simply rinse out his sippy cups instead of washing them in the dishwasher, they can smell kind of funky. (Do you like how I’m putting that into the “not so bad” category. I hope that gives you some perspective on what I think of as “successful” parenting. Funky-smelling cup = meh, it’s probably still clean enough). So I transfer the milk to a different cup, one that has been washed properly in the dishwasher. Except when I give it back to Adam, he takes another sip and says, “icky milk.” Sooooo, I smelled the milk. And TO BE FAIR….it really didn’t smell that bad. It was definitely not spoiled. It was just approaching that point of…ummmmmm, maybe we should get some new milk. Now, it wouldn’t be so awful if the story ended there. No one has to know. I will just get new milk. No harm done. However, we go to lunch with my parents the next day and I ordered Adam a milk. He takes a sip, and he holds the cup up and says to me, “Better milk, mama. Milk not icky.” And so now, the waitress, and my parents, know that fresh milk is a treat for my child because I’m too lazy to pay close attention to the expiration date on my milk at home. Adam even reminded me for a week or so after this by saying, “milk not icky, mama. Mama go to the store,” each time he took a sip of not-funky-smelling milk…
While some of Adam’s behaviors make a lot of sense (he asks questions and tries to put his new knowledge into practice), sometimes he does things that make no sense at all. Awhile ago, a friend was over and said something about a pillow on our couch being weird and uncomfortable. She reached inside the pillow case to find that Adam had put about 8 cardboard coasters in there. Because…why not? A few days ago, we walked Lola around the block (which, by yourself with a baby in a stroller and 2-yr-old who is distracted by every stick and acorn and leaf you come across can turn into quite the ordeal). We had just started walking, when Adam started patting his stomach and saying something I couldn’t quite understand. I could tell he was acting uncomfortable, so I went over to assess what was going on. When I lifted up his jacket, I found the 8(ish) coasters…shoved up under his shirt. Why? What? He will also experience some “stream of consciousness” thoughts every so often. Last week, I bought him some little chocolates with wrappers that look like basketballs. As a treat, he will get to have 1 or 2 after lunch or dinner (or sometimes for a snack in the mornings…maybe…I don’t know…). Anyways, I was holding him a couple of days ago and he straight up smacked me on the boob and said, “Adam running out of chocolate soon.” As if it made sense to put those 2 things together. It was hard for me to even be offended because I was just so confused.
As Adam continues to develop his quirky little personality, Nick is starting to act more like his own little person, too. He’s a super sweet baby. I swear, he smiles all of the time. And it’s not just a subtle smile. It’s the kind of smile that takes over his entire face. And it takes so little to get him to smile. Andy and I think it is the cutest thing when he smiles suuuuuper big…and then we start to wonder…what if…he’s really dumb…and that’s why he smiles at everything… I know!! It’s a terrible thing to think. But he smiles so much, you guys. I guess we’ll just have to wait and see…
As I mentioned before, Nick is starting to move more and really reach out for things. I worried that with my second child, I wouldn’t be as excited when he started reaching all those little milestones, but I feel like I’m just as proud. He rolls around like crazy and is even starting to scoot a little bit. I recently had a wave of anxiety thinking about all that baby proofing we are going to have to do once he can crawl from room to room. I put him down in Adam’s play room the other day, and within 2 minutes of him being on the rug, he rolled over, ripped the front cover of one of Adam’s book, and was shoving a piece of paper into his mouth. He’s a monster!!!! I’m also amazed at how quickly I’ve forgotten what happens when as far as developmental stuff goes. For example, I feel like I’m much less patient when it comes to sleeping. It seems like Adam was sleeping through the night by this time, but Nick still gets up once in the middle of the night to eat. Andy and I talked about letting him cry it out, because I don’t feel like he really needs to eat, however, we looked it up in the baby sleep book we have, and apparently it’s normal for 5-6 month olds to still wake up to eat once or even twice at night. So…shit. The good news is, Nick’s last feeding during the day is usually around 6 and then he doesn’t need to eat until 3 or 4am. AKA, I can get pretty drunk in the evening and be good to go by the time he needs to eat again…priorities…
I guess the newest thing about Nick is teeth!! Adam didn’t start getting his until around 9 months, so Nick wins in that category. (I’m keeping score of which kid does stuff first/better so I can use it to my advantage in the future. That’s what you’re supposed to do, right?). I don’t remember teething being as awful with Adam. Or maybe it’s because Nick is so smiley and happy all the time, that when he’s upset, it seems like the worst. Also, having a sharp tooth poke through your gums sounds awful. I know we all did it, but witnessing the process slowly, with a 5-month-old, really reinforces why some parents used to rub a little alcohol on their kids’ gums. Drink up, little one. That shit hurts.
One final update…I am an aunt!! For the first time!! It’s kind of strange to experience motherhood (twice) before experiencing aunthood…aunt…dom?…aunt…ness? It’s a whole other kind of excitement. I get to be related to an adorable little baby, that I didn’t have to labor with and deliver, and that I don’t have to raise but can spoil as much as I want. It seems pretty fantastic so far. I get to meet my nephew over Thanksgiving and I am incredibly excited to exercise my obsessive kissing compulsion on another small human. I’m also excited for Adam and Nick to have a cousin close to them in age. Although I’m sure upon first meeting, Adam will just see him as another enemy who could potentially, accidentally reach out and grab something of his. And Nick will probably just smile and accidentally reach out and grab something of his. But hopefully they will all grow to be good buddies. They can get together and talk about how weird their parents are. Especially Aunt Barbara, who always seems to have purple teeth…
scrumtrulescence 